Fire and Ice for Refinement

Let’s talk about movies. Everyone who knows me know that … movies, they are my very first love. Blame my mother. I was practically born in a movie house, not to mention the infamous escalator fight at Ali Mall between Tony (my legitimate father) and Sugar (my biological father) while my Mom was showing re-issues of movies during her Makati Film Society years. My life itself seems to mimic every cliche in every movie. And I don’t joke about these things.

Last night, I was surfing the cable and couldn’t find anything to stir my interest (even after Mai had texted me about Star Trek: First Contact on HBO). Going from Disney Channel to ETC 2nd Ave I would have to pass through Discovery Channel. I rarely stop over there. I’m not a documentary chick, I bore easily and my attention slips away quickly. But, surely the name Chen Kaige would catch my attention and would make it stick like glue.

Chen Kaige is the director of “Farewell My Concubine” … not really my favorite Chen Kaige/Leslie Cheung/Gong Li movie (I like “Temptress Moon” better between the 2 movies). However, I cannot deny the fact that IT IS a remarkable movie. I was raised with a Maoist point of view (a little too biased that when I went to college, that was the only time I found out that the quotes I was raised with was actually from Sun Tzu’s Art of War), so watching a movie debating that era is something NEED TO BE WATCHED. I mean my brother’s other name is Rojo Guerero (Spanish for Red Guard, isn’t it?), and this movie tackled the roles of Red Guards in the Cultural Revolution.

I’m one to uphold culture. Even though sometimes I don’t understand it, I’m a soldier who will fight for it, unconditionally. It doesn’t matter if its pop or art, Philippines or any other nation. Jologs is a culture. I fight for it.

So imagine my shock and my revulsion when I saw “Farewell …” and how it depicted the struggle for culture to survive. I was so young when I first saw the movie, I didn’t understand it quite fluidly. About a month ago, ABC 5 (Bless them all!) showed the film and this is when I fully appreciated an article I read way back in 2003 from Time Magazine (1995). It relentlessly discussed the three faces of China and their corresponding movie. In mainland, they have a rich pool of talents, yet they are severly oppressed. I guess, oppression and hate does cultivate finery, as fire and hammer mold exquisite silverware.

So does that mean I need to feed my hatred to produce wonderful works? I did well with “The Prophet and the Chlorox Kids” because I disdain the actual experience. I did well with “A Warm Alaska Night” as I was hating myself and the betrayal I had to go through back then. So now that I’m content and relaxed, am I unimaginative?

[TO BE CONTINUED …]

New Worlds 4 Cosplay Contest and Masquerade Ball

New Worlds 4 Cosplay Contest and Masquerade Ball

Cosplay Contest

Every year, many convention visitors look forward to the Cosplay Contest, where fans dress up as their favorite science fiction and fantasy characters. The crowds flock to see blue or green skin, androids, Jedi, Sith, Federation officers, and in some cases, even vehicles!

This year, the Cosplay Contest will be held during the Masquerade Ball, at 6PM on July 16, 2006.

Masquerade Ball

The Masquerade Ball is a grand event intended to cap off another great convention. The Masquerade Ball will include the cosplay contest, the finale of the NWA Race, and musical numbers of a science fiction and fantasy flavor.

Masquerade Ball Program:
I. Parade of Royalty
II. Parade of Ball Cosplayers
III. Parade of Science Fiction and Fantasy Cosplayers
IV. Photo Shoot on Stage
V. Musical Number
VI. NWA Race Finals
VII. Awarding of Caption Contest Winners
VIII. Awarding of Cosplay Winners
IX. Awarding of NWA Race Winners

The New Worlds Alliance, Fully Booked, PLDT and Level Up! present:

New Worlds 4: A Broken Time Machine
The Fourth Philippine Science Fiction and Fantasy Convention

July 16, 2006, Rockwell Tent, Power Plant Mall

www.newworlds.ph

New Worlds 4: A Broken Time Machine

The New Worlds Alliance and Fully Booked present:

The First Philippine Graphic/Fiction Awards

July 15, 2006, Rockwell Tent, Power Plant Mall

***

The New Worlds Alliance, Fully Booked, PLDT and Level Up! present:

New Worlds 4: A Broken Time Machine
The Fourth Philippine Science Fiction and Fantasy Convention

July 16, 2006, Rockwell Tent, Power Plant Mall

Activities of New Worlds 4
First Philippine Graphic/Fiction Awards
The countdown to the Unmasking begins!

Mark your calendars - JULY 15, 2006 (SATURDAY) at the Rockwell Tent. Join us as we exhibit the best works in fiction and comics, and award the best of them with a grand cash prize of P100,000!!!

Everyone is encouraged to show up with an originally created MASK, in line with the theme of FILIPINO FANTASY. Prizes shall be given out that night to the best original masks.

Writers’ Panel

Philippine Fandom is not just about going crazy over foreign shows. Filipino fans are also about appreciating works that stir the imagination and open the heart to the possible.

There are those among us who have done this and taken fandom to the next logical step. They have become creators in their own right. Get to meet them at New

Worlds 4: A Broken Time Machine – The 4th Philippine Science Fiction and Fantasy Convention. Chat with them and find out what drives them to take this leap of faith, and what it took them to do it successfully.

Convention Auctions

An exciting addition to this year’s convention is the New Worlds Auction, which will feature fan memorabilia, collectibles, and general merchandise at great prices. The New Worlds Alliance counts hundreds of dedicated science-fiction and fantasy fans among its ranks, so expect a wide and colorful selection of items.

This will be a silent auction. Participants will be able to keep track of the auction by watching large bulletin boards set up at the auction booth and at various places in the convention area.

New Worlds Amazing Race

It’s a race against time and other geeks as the teams scurry through challenge after challenge to win the New Worlds Amazing Race.

Last year, 10 groups posed challenges to 7 teams. In the semi-finals, teams PHP, PHS, VA and PTM competed to be part of the finals, but the face-off was between Isab and Hershey of PHP, and Ranulf and Sasha of PHS.

Last year, the Hogwarts students bagged the victory through Isab’s award-winning handstand. Due to the success of last year’s race, most of the NWA member groups clamored for a reprise for New Worlds 4. The challenges are more outrageous, the race is more exciting, and the finale will be a bigger surprise than before.

Parties interested in participating in this year’s race are encouraged to brush up on their knowledge of science fiction and fantasy. Who knows? Knowing how to spell the name of that obscure race in the Star Wars universe may pay off. Who will win this year?

Cosplay Contest

Every year, many convention visitors look forward to the Cosplay Contest, where fans dress up as their favorite science fiction and fantasy characters. The crowds flock to see blue or green skin, androids, Jedi, Sith, Federation officers, and in some cases, even vehicles!

This year, the Cosplay Contest will be held during the Masquerade Ball, at 6PM on July 16, 2006.

Masquerade Ball

The Masquerade Ball is a grand event intended to cap off another great convention. The Masquerade Ball will include the cosplay contest, the finale of the NWA Race, and musical numbers of a science fiction and fantasy flavor.

Masquerade Ball Program:
I. Parade of Royalty
II. Parade of Ball Cosplayers
III. Parade of Science Fiction and Fantasy Cosplayers
IV. Photo Shoot on Stage
V. Musical Number
VI. NWA Race Finals
VII. Awarding of Caption Contest Winners
VIII. Awarding of Cosplay Winners
IX. Awarding of NWA Race Winners

***

The New Worlds Alliance (NWA) was founded in 2003 by seven local science fiction and fantasy fan groups: Via Astris - The Star Trek Club of the Philippines, Star Wars Philippines, The Philippine Tolkien Society, Pinoy Harry Potter, Pinoy X-Philes, Pinoy Slayers, and The Alliance of Eclectic Gamers and Interactive Storytellers (AEGIS). Its aim was to provide a venue for Filipino science fiction and fantasy fans to interact, hold activities, and express themselves and their love for their respective fandoms. (read more about it here.) In March of that same year, Via Astris hosted “New Worlds: The 1st Philippine Science Fiction and Fantasy Convention,” at the Premiere Cinema Complex to celebrate the release of “Star Trek: Nemesis”.

In January 2004, it was The Philippine Tolkien Society’s turn to host “A Long Expected Party: The 2nd Philippine Science Fiction and Fantasy Convention”, to mark the end of the Lord of the Rings movie saga and the release of “The Lord of the Rings: The Return of the King”. The original seven Alliance members groups were joined by The Matrix Philippines, Arkham Philippines, Pinoy Fremen, The Talon, and the Philippine Highlander Society in the two-day event at the Powerplant Mall Parking Quad.

With the advent of “Star Wars Episode III: Revenge of the Sith”, Star Wars Philippines organized “New Worlds Episode III: The 3rd Philippine Science Fiction and Fantasy Convention” in May 2005 at the Glorietta Activity Center. Four new groups were inaugurated into the Alliance this year: Mechapinoy, Sci-fi Philippines, The Philippine Order of Narnians, and CharmedPinoy. Wheel of Time Philippines also participated as a guest group.

This year, the NWA and Fully Booked present “New Worlds 4: A Broken Time Machine,” in celebration of Neil Gaiman’s First Philippine Graphic/Fiction Awards.

The awarding ceremony will be held on 15 July 2006, and will coincide with the Fourth Philippine Science Fiction and Fantasy Convention on 16 July at the Rockwell Tent, Makati City.

Pagkakalat sa Stage

I have just consistently broken my 8th New Year’s resolution.  But the year is young and my time is insesantly booked by handful of events and friends.  And people who knows me, knows that in my set of construed priorites, friends come first.

So for now, I leave you with an old old old article I wrote for school folio.  Cute story actually, but not my best written work.

 

—**oOo**—

When I was five, The Church of Jesus Christ and Latter Day Saints held various activities for Sunday school. Eat Bulaga’s Little Miss Philippines was very popular back then. Every mother of a young girl wanted her child to participate in similar pageants. So the Church held a pageant for the Sunday School students. Since I’m a girl, my mother excitedly entered me, to have something to brag about.

      They prepared me weeks in advance.  

They bought an exceedingly uncomfortable pink lace gown from Baclaran.  It was an off-shoulder gown.  It had ruffles everywhere and its skirt looked like a big bell that swayed with my every move.  It itched as I wore it.  But boy, did I look good in that gown.

They picked a Madonna song for me to dance.  Material Girl to be specific. They taught me each step holding my fists up high. It seemed to me I was just marching back and forth, and of course, with my fist held up high. My not liking Madonna did not help. I’m a weird girl with a weird taste and liked weird artists. I liked Cindy Lauper then and her “Girls Just Wanna Have Fun”. But they told me, girls dancing in Madonna’s songs were cuter, judges preferred them better. I just wanna have fun. But they were taking this beauty contest way too seriously.

They told me to put both of my hands on the left side of my hips, the way little girls do in Eat Bulaga. I have to flash them my biggest smile and show them my priceless dimples I inherited from my father. I had to memorize my line to introduce myself. “My name is Desiree Ann Samson, I am five years old. I live in 49, Tahimik Street, Imus Cavite. I am in kindergarten Sunday school”. That was all I had to remember. And my dance step with my fists held up high.

After all these, I realized I didn’t want to enter the pageant. I was extremely insecure about myself. Who was I kidding? I knew very well that I have a physical abnormality and that I would never be beautiful enough to win such an event. Even if I looked pretty damn good in my pink-itchy-ruffled-gown. Plus the fact that I didn’t want to dance, I wanted to sing.

On the pageant day itself, I told everybody that I had everything under control. I was getting really annoyed at the fact that everybody was reminding me what to say, how to dance, to hold up my fists as I march back and forth on the stage, and even how to walk in when my name was called. I was too arrogant to listen to anybody. When I was finally called, I walked in with my hands on the side and waving with a smile. I introduced myself, “Good evening everybody. My name is Desiree Ann Samson. I am five years old.” And then I noticed all the people watching. I started to shudder at the sight of all the people in the audience, not to mention my brothers’ friends whom I had a crush on. I forgot what I was supposed to say, “I live in…I live in…I live in…Thank you.” I took a bow and quickly went off the stage.

My brothers were laughing their heads off. My mother just shook her head. She wasn’t able to get something to brag about, instead got a joke to tell her friends. That pageant became my family’s favorite laughing matter for years. To make matters worst, my brothers would put in the betamax video tape of the pageant every time they wanted to taunt me. I swore I would never enter another beauty pageant again.

But I did join another contest when I was ten. A singing contest in our town. I love singing but I also know that I’m always out of tune. I didn’t dare to sign up, and my family wasn’t friendly enough with the neighbors to know that there was a contest. But the organizers wanted one more contestant. The contest was going to be held in two hours and they asked me if I could join. I was too arrogant to say no. I thought I could do it. I got one of my Whitney Houston multiplex cassette tape and started practicing.  I chose All at Once.

      Within the two hours, I practiced with all my heart.  This was my time, my moment.  Now, I could show them that I was meant to sing and not to dance Madonna. I imagined how I would look like. I took a chair in my make-believe stage. Took it out, I sang better when I’m standing up. Held a hairbrush, pretended it was a microphone. I sang on the top of my lungs. Who wouldn’t? It’s a Whitney Houston song.

After two hours, I sat among the contestants in the basketball court where they put up a stage for the performers. One of the judges happened to be my brother’s ex-girlfriend. I became too confident just by knowing that I had an edge against my competitors. I was too arrogant.

      When the other contestant sang, I compared myself to them.  I’m better than these people, I told myself.  I look better than these people, I convinced myself.  I have more star quality (more of star complex) than these people, I kept on telling myself.  I was too preoccupied in comparing myself to the other contestants that I forgot to be nervous.  When I heard my name being called up on the stage, I ran up quickly and took the microphone. 

I heard my tape start. I was actually doing good. I wasn’t making up the lyrics, like the other contestant did. My voice had force, power, and rhythm. I wasn’t even out of tune. With so much confidence I sang. But I should have never looked at the audience. My knees started to shake. My mind seemed like a chalk board being erased slowly. I forgot the lyrics of my song.

I panicked and forgot what I was supposed to sing. Instead, I sang on the microphone, “All at once…Ay Sus-Maria-Josep!” and hit my forehead. That ended my singing career.

I never entered any other contest that involved stages ever again. The trauma just would not let me, and my brothers too. They would always use the “Thank You” and “Sus-Maria-Josep” incidents whenever they wanted something to laugh about. The betamax is long gone, and Whitney Houston can’t be remembered anymore. But every Christmas reunion, these contest follies were a sure fire hit to all of them.

I wish I could laugh about it, too. It’s just that, I don’t find it funny.

Welcome 2006

2005.  Exit Stage Left. 
2006.  Enter Stage Right.

It was a good year.  Despite my sucky financials, it was a good year long adventure.

I learned a lot.  Seen a lot.  Taught a lot.

I met a lot of people.  And met with a lot of old faces.

I opened a few chapters.  And closed some.

I am praying this new year be as good to me as the last, and to my financials.

JANUARY 1, 2006

I started my day switching the TV on.  First movie I saw, “FINDING NEMO”.  It never fails.  Like Edward Scissorhands, it made me cry over and over again.  Father Issues?  Yeah I HAD a lot.  HAD.

Here I am right now, writing about it.  But that’s not really the topic of my blog today.

Like every person in the whole world, January 1st is a great day to re-invent yourself.  It’s the invisible restart button of your personality.  You say this year I’ll do this and that and stop this and that.  And Every year I join the bandwagon and accomplish none of it.  So I thought, maybe I should write it in a blog to remember it.  Publish it for everyone to see.  A reminder that will serve as a gauge if I have done something great every quarter.

FIXED PURPOSE

Resolution also means Determination and Determination is a Fixed Purpose.

Here are my Top Ten Resolution.

10.  Wash the dishes immediately after eating.


There is only one thing I do at home.  I don’t wash the laundry as it gets me all out of breath by the end of the day (Pity too as I enjoy doing laundry).  I don’t iron clothes as it brigns out the OC-nitpicking side of me slowing down the process and I end up ironing only one piece of clothing.  I don’t cook.  Not that I couldn’t (I remember cooking for TC lunch and dinner, ask Rez).  I just hate my kitchen and it drives me nuts when I coudn’t find a place to chop my onions.  Hence I’m left with Dishwashing and still I end up procrastinating the damn chore.

9.  Start cooking again.


I used to cook.  Really, I did.  Before I went to live in Catalan, I cooked for a great number of people known as the Thespian Cirlce.  Not as often as I want to as we all took turns in that chore.  But as soon as I stepped in Catalan, there was always somebody to cook for me and I lost the skill.  I couldn’t even remember the recepes I used to cook.  Heck, I don’t even remember how to do omelets anymore.  Time to unleash cooking master dek.

8.  I shall consistently blog for better or worse in all my 6 blog sites.


I started blogging 2005.  I now just have to make it consistent.  Cheap Thrill Seekers have to be updated everytime I get an interesting pic.  Jologs should be updated once a week and if things are good within the first quarter improve to 2x a week.  Faeries and Demons, everytime I get a worthy dream write it down in a notebook immediately and transfer in the site.  LJ as a daily exercise, anything and everything interesting about me.  Multiply as a daily exercise, anything and everything interesting I think of.  And Homebound, bi-weekly all chuvaness in my household, my harem, my sons and everybody else in the dek-verse.

7. Keep in touch


Three years I was in hiding.  Three years I let go of people I loved and took care of me all those years in UPLB pre-cirsis days.  Three years I have garnered another set of people who take good care of me and love me despite of who I am and the shame I went through.  Unmask dek and let everybody see I’m healed and I’m new.  I have to prove to myself all the love and taking care of is worth it to the people in my past, my present and the people in my future.

6.  Treat everything with a sense of Urgency.


My mom has an urgency addiction.  Sadly, I, on the other hand, am too lax in any discipline that procrastinating is already synonimous to my name.  My mom should rub off some of that addiction on me.

5. Make my mom feel special for a change.


EEEEEEKKK!!! This will be hard, my mom has the grand delusion that one day I’ll lie to her and say Sugar is actually her guardian.  She doesn’t believe in my belief and what I see and she doesn’t listen to what I’m saying.  However, this could be the last year she’ll be with us.  I had told her 2004 that all her VISA application will be rejected.  I told her her annulment will not be done in 6 months.  I told her she will not be able to leave for the USA within 2005.  But I also said that they’d be able to re-apply for the VISA by November.  That has happened.  Let’s see if my gut feeling will be proven right again.  She will get her VISA around end of April or start of May and she will leave us around end of May or early June (depends on where she wants to spend her birthday, but somehow I think she’ll spend it here).  The future is always so fickle.  Sometimes SUGAR-coating is better to make one feel better.

 
4. Compartmentalizing, Consistency, Commitment


Paolo J. has so many plans of his own.  I myself have many plans of my own.  But some of those plans coincide.  Now we really don’t have any problem with that.  I do, however, have a problem with the triple C.  I need to learn how to compartmentalize my life, stay consistent in my work and keep the commitments I make.  Everything will turn out for the best.  I know it.  It is time to build the empire.  It is time to start somewhere for next decade’s World Domination.

3. Take better care fo your self.

Morbid dek came back last night.  Images of impossible bullets flying in our window and hitting me in the head plagued my brain until I left the window and stayed sitted in the dinning.  But unlike before, I have no hopes of dying anymore.  Angsty dek no longer resides this body.  I need to slim down, tone up and be very beautiful.  I know I am.  I need to stop seeking for someone who will say it, and instead start making everyone see it.

2. Write, write, write.



I’ve got to finish my stories.  As soon as I’m done with my January 30th deadline, I will consistently write all those stories stocked in my head.  Time to unleash my children.  So that means my dear dear players, we will continue playing on February, and the Writers guild will be active for now.

And the number 1 Resolution to take in 2006 is …



1. Let go and move on.


 

 



 

 

Idee Fixe

For 25 years (or at least since I can remember that I had thoughts) I’ve been figuring out a way to stop obsessing.I’m not an OC-OC like Penny or Miao or Ate Fe on anything they do.I just obsess on something and it plagues my mind.

No. This is not another JPLM article.Believe me.Even with him in my mind all day, I obsess on a lot of other things too. 


RENT, AIDS AND HOMOSEXUALITY 

As anyone can see on the side bar, my new obsession is RENT.The movie came out in theatres in the USA last November 23, 2005.I’m waiting for it to be shown here in the Philippines.The only thing that will keep me from watching it is Metro Manila Film Festival, in which case I would not have any choice but to wait for it to pass through.Not that I don’t like MMFF.In fact, I’m so excited about it.Alice Dixon stars in Okay Ka Fairy Ko!

That is another story.Moving on …

Rent is about a group of friends, combinations of a gay pair, a lesbo pair and a hetero pair, and some other people on the side.Weirdly, they also seem to have the Melrose Place syndrome, swapping partners and lovers.It comes so naturally to American cliques, don’t they?

Half of these people have AIDS.And that’s the plot device they whirled the story around.That and homelessness.

I don’t have AIDS and neither am I homeless.Lucky me.But somehow, I have always had a profound affinity, if not pity, to the issue of and people with AIDS.I feel it’s the most unfair disease ever invented by man.Especially to children afflicted by mistake.

Although, it has plagued our lives for decades, I still seem to have too little information about it.I hear more opinions and myths.I see more detest and anxiety.And all I can do is wear a red ribbon on my clothing and light a candle for everyone’s peace.

So ever since December 1, World AIDS day, I couldn’t think of anything but RENT.I can’t find any sense why.

METRO MANILA FILM FESTIVAL

I couldn’t wait for the upcoming MMFF.There are 3 noteworthy movies that call on to the child in me (no I’m not pregnant, sorry kayo).

MULAWIN

Just because I like the concept, the writing and Mama Pirena.

ENCHANTED KINGDOM

Just because Long is a villain and he looked so serious in there and I wanna see if he’s ok as a serious villain.

OKAY KA FAIRY KO

Alice Dixon is back.And I just can’t wait what she’s playing in that movie.But, somehow, I feel like I’d be more excited if it was Tweety De Leon.I grew up watching her as Faye, not Alice Dixon.Tweety was Faye the longest.

ENCANTADIA AT ETHERIA

The acting still sucks (except for the 4 Sang’gre), but everything else makes up for it.This week is its last week.And next week, Etheria starts.

Yehey!!! Dennis Trillo in costume again.Woohoo!!!!

But still, if he’s playing the young Raquim, I still don’t see why?He doesn’t look like Richard Gomez!

Oh well, at least, when I’m there, I’m not gonna make the same casting mistakes.Either that, I’m gonna drill some acting skills in my actors if they don’t have any.

So that everything else wouldn’t need to make up for it.So it is completely beautiful from top to bottom.

(more…)

MY JAKSON, NOT MY JAKE

The people who know me by the name of DACS and reading this must be screaming either in their heads (if they’re diffident) or outright blurt one or all of the following argot:

·“Siya na naman? Wala ka ba’ng kasawaan sa kanya?”

·“Akala ko ba he doesn’t deserve you? Bakit siya na naman ang topic mo?”

·“Didn’t you leave all this crap in LB?”

·“Move ON!”

·“Girl! Do us a favor and LET IT GO!”

·“I’ve given up on you and this subject a looooong time ago.”

So before you react as harshly as I did with the title alone, go through with me in this (yet again) long write up.This experience is my own little Journey to the West.Three years journey, and what I needed to learn, I learned when I came back where I started.

Before moving along, I would like to give credit where credit is due.PeeJ, BF, and Tarps.I send it to Dex, Duds and Migs as well.
—> click on more please.

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I.PH Prob and other Ramblings

I don’t know what’s wrong … is it my computer or is it my I.PH account?  I can’t seem to modify my settings.  I wanna change my layout, but it upon publishing, it always comes out as BAD GATEWAY. 
Please help me.

I wanna see something I wrote on a pretty background.  Green is my color and I like it all to be all sooo cutie as possible. In Ian Sison’s words, Prettified.

Now I can’t even put my title anymore.  It’s supposed to be “Preachings of the High Priestess.”

Maybe I should change it.  I’ve been using Preaching since college in those organization’s log book.  I love those log books.  Those were primitive blog and tag boards.  I got into a lot of trouble because of that.  Actually, I got a lot of PEOPLE in trouble because of that.  Cause I usually talk about them.

No wait.  I just got one person in trouble with his ex-gilfriend.

Speaking of Exes, we’ve been talking about why women leave men lately.  Thanks to a dear friend’s recent heart break experience.

Gigi Angeles explained that Alpha Female looks for Alpha Male as a life partner.  That got me thinking.  What am I? Am I an Alpha Female on a look out for an Alpha Male?

I don’t like Mama’s boys … I don’t care if they’re the ordinary kind of mama’s boys or the kind of mama’s boy who hates their moms but still clutches on them like their some kind of tower shield.  But I also don’t like them dissing their moms and wouldn’t be there when their parents need them.

I fell in love with a control freak, but hated it so much when he was controlling me, and my smoking, and my eating pleasure.  Dammit’! I still can’t get myself to eat Roastbeef, you know. 

I don’t like gifts, especially roses and chocolates.  Give me Skittles anytime.  But I also appreciate little things like cds, even pirated, of tv shows, movies and albums of any of my fave band … that is aside from Eheads.

I’m confused.

Bet you, I’ve confused most of my friends and family.

I WANNA CHANGE MY LAYOUT!
 
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Gamugamu, Bangka at Whedon

  Book      River    Simon  Inara     Mal    Zoe    Wash   Kayle    Jayne

fire·fly    (frfl)

n.

Any of various nocturnal beetles of the family Lampyridae, characteristically having luminescent chemicals in the posterior tip of the abdomen that produce a flashing light. Also called lightning bug. See Regional Note at lightning bug.

se·ren·i·ty     (s-rn-t)

n.

The state or quality of being serene.

se·rene    (s-rn)

adj.

1. Unaffected by disturbance; calm and unruffled.
2. Unclouded; fair: serene skies and a bright blue sea.
3. often Serene Used as a title and form of address for certain members of royalty: Her Serene Highness; His Serene Highness

FIREFLY + SERENITY
=
ONE KICKASS MOVIE

(more…)

Sometimes They Come Back …

A few months back, I signed up to this thing called Name Database … unfortunately, I’m not able to send enough emails and never got to unlock my memebership (unless I pay in which case I wouldn’t anways).  You can search people by your school.

But it wasn’t really all for nought.  Just today, I received a message from somebody I’ve been looking for for such a long time.

Bong Cedo … he’s one of the good friends I had in High School.  Unfortunately for me, he was also the first guy I had this greatest infatuation for.  He has one of the best voice I’ve ever heard and he’s athletic too.  He ain’t a geek though.  Then again, in High School I preferred band members over gamers.  It all kinda changed in College when I really fell in love for real for the first time in my life.  But that’s another long story.  Ok … going back to the present …

So we exchanged cp #s, send regards to his wife (a classmate from high school to college) and got his friendster account.  He was quite surprised that I was still using the name he tagged me way back in grade school.  Yes, it was him who gave me the “Dekya” nick.  And from his friendster I found our other friends.  It feels really great to find my old school friends again.

Stephen King’s “Sometimes They Come Back” suddenly popped in my mind.And then, after I’ve actually seen the movie a couple of times and finishing the short story a few times over, it is just now that I fully understood it.Now, that my past came back to haunt me.Or at least it felt that way.I suddenly remembered why I didn’t put too much effort looking for the friends I used to have in High School.Why I kept on changing friends so often and not stay too long.

I was actually afraid of remembering who I was back then.I was afraid to accept I was a big loser, totally screwed up blaming everything that was in my way.But actually, I was to be blamed.I was the one who screwed myself up and almost threw away my future.I almost gave up my dreams just because nothing was going the way I wanted it to go.

It wasn’t my dad’s fault … I’ve accepted that years ago.It wasn’t because I fell in love and was rejected, that was the lousiest excuse I used.It was simply because I was stupid and arrogant.And I was afraid to accept my own faults and my own short comings.

These were the ones that came back when Bong sent me a message. But now, I’m ready to open up. I have to seek them and learn who I was and what became of me.

No more hiding.  Time to go back to my roots and retrieve a part of my heart to complete myself.

Sa Aking Pagkamulat sa Tamang Pangarap

In other words my thoughts on “Sa Aking Pagkagising Mula Sa Kamulatan”

WARNING: Another long piece … and I’ve also posted this on my other blogs … however, I’ve just deleted this piece from those blogs cause I’m currently re-organizing all my blogs.  Since this is my social commentary blog, this is where this piece belongs.  Haaaay … organizing life is such a tedious task.

TGIS vs Tabing Ilog

This is one of the most superficial things I have ever written.  But hey it got me to the first Teen Advisory Boards search finals.  Or at least the interview stage.
 
WARNING:  It’s a futile article. 

THE PROPHET AND THE CHLOROX KIDS

 
This is the first essay I tried to get published … and it was. Philippine Daily Inquirer, Youngblood, December 7, 2000 under the title “Fanaticism”.  That was a long time ago.  I have shown a lot of people the published version.  But everybody knows that anything passed to be published gets some cuts and bruises.  This is the original, uncut version.

WARNING:  Very-very-very long.

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